After a crappy couple of days I was feeling really blah when I got home today. I do not want to talk about the crappy stuff, instead I want to talk about the happy stuff (what I did to feel better).
The best thing that could have happened, did happen. My husband took my 3 oldest daughters skating with an awesome Groupon I found a few weeks ago. Why is this awesome? It is because they are out of my hair? Well, sort of.
Friday, March 22, 2013
Saturday, February 16, 2013
Tutorial - No Sew Floor Pillow
This is my first tutorial. I am so excited about this project that I did. I have been looking for affordable bean bags or floor pillows for my children for over a year. We have a small living room with a small couch. If more than 2 or 3 of us are watching TV then some of us have to sit on the hard floor. I have never found any bean bags or floor pillows that I was willing to pay for. So, yesterday I was looking through an ad for my local fabric and craft store and they had foam by the yard on sale (50% off) and fleece on sale (40-50% off). Then, it hit me. I could make floor pillows and my kids could help me.
Monday, January 21, 2013
Spa Day - woot woot!
One thing my girls complain about the most lately is that I do not do "spa days" with them anymore. So today I decided to try somethings I have seen on pinterest and have a spa day.
Kairah and Kaijah have curly hair that gets very dry and damaged. So I tried the simplest natural (kitchen) hair treatment I found on pinterest (here). All I did was run coconut oil through their hair and wrap with cling wrap. I had them each sit under a "rigged" blow dryer for 15 minutes.
We did all of our other spa plans while they kept the coconut oil in their hair. I painted their nails. I do not do manicures any more because I figure they are old enough to remove polish and trim their own nails. Kairah had me do a design she found on pinterest (here).
Lastly, we "waxed" their eye brows with this sugaring recipe I found on pinterest (here). I used the first recipe. The hardest part for me was finding the perfect temperature to put it on. Either is was too hot or too hard, but we worked through it. Kailah even got in on this action :D .
BTW, I did Charlie's nails yesterday. Are they not just too cute!
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The coconut treatment made their hair so soft and Kairah's curls even lay longer than they usually so. So I call that a success! Does anyone else do their own spa days at home?
Kairah and Kaijah have curly hair that gets very dry and damaged. So I tried the simplest natural (kitchen) hair treatment I found on pinterest (here). All I did was run coconut oil through their hair and wrap with cling wrap. I had them each sit under a "rigged" blow dryer for 15 minutes.
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Thursday, January 10, 2013
Maintaining and/or Growing a Friendship on a Budget
One of my goals for 2013 is to maintain and/or grow friendships. I can honestly admit that I am lacking in the know how in this area. So, I got to thinking, how would one do this? I thought about how I have done this in the past. It seemed to me that when I had the best social interactions it involved money. I then thought how could this be? How can friendship cost money? Especially when our average income is down from previous years; but it does not seem to matter. As a society we feel the need to go to restaurants for meals, go to or host home sales parties, go to or host game parties that cost money, be a part of an organization that costs money. It is not just adults that feel this way either. Children are the same.
I remember when I was a child, I forged friendships while playing outside in the neighborhood or at the park. I attended birthday parties that consisted of cake and a home made game of pin-the-tail on the donkey. If we were lucky we had pizza. I have tried to have these types of parties for my children and no one attends, but throw a party at a roller rink, amusement park, or sales business and you will max out in participation. I also fork over money to organizations, sports associations, and dance studios so my children can get some exercise and social skills since all of the other children are at these things instead of playing in the street.
I decided to see how much it cost me when I did these social activities and this is what I came up with:
That is a lot of money. $107 a month and this does not include the activities my children participated in. This has led me to my current search for free or inexpensive ways to have friendships or social interaction. It is an important part of life and I have decided to not let the economic stagnation and/or decline affect it.
I reviewed some blogs that made suggestions on how to maintain friendships in general. Gretchen Rubin started what she calls a "Happiness Project" that as a part of it she suggests ways to maintain friendships. I found these 8 items to be rather useful. Dummies.com also had some useful information. I strongly identified with the debt princess's article about losing friendships when times got tough for her. In contrast I wanted my article to focus on actual activities one could do to maintain or grow friendships without spending a lot of money or how about any money at all. :D
Game Night. You can do this with families or not. It could be a pot luck or just have a few snacks available.
Movie or TV Show night. This can also be with families or not. The home DVR which quite a few of us have can make this even easier since you do not have to ask friends to come over on a Tuesday, instead record the show and have them over on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon or evening. I used to watch a favorite show with some neighbors (and even my deployed husband would watch over webcam sometimes). It was a blast. We played a game during commercials and had wine or drinks if we could afford them.
Potluck, BBQs, Brunches, Lunches or Dinners. This can be inexpensive and seems to be a favorite for most.
Start a Group. A book club, play group, scrapbooking group etc. can be inexpensive especially when you can borrow a book from a library, use toys or supplies you already have and are not charging monthly dues.
Go to a Free Outdoor Location. I am lucky to live in Florida where the weather is beautiful most of the time. I enjoy going to the park and beach. All I have to do to make it a group activity is invite some people.
Long distance friendships are a little tougher to me. Number 5 on Gretchen Rubins list made me feel a little more at ease with this. My long distance friendships are those kinds that I can go years without talking to someone, but call them up when I am in town or out of the blue and we pick up like we just spoke yesterday. Social Media has helped with long distance friendships in my opinion, but cannot replace a good ol' fashioned phone call or meet up. Here are a few ideas for long distance friendships:
Phone Calls. Calling a friend once a week, once a month, once a year or whenever can lift the spirits.
Letters. With the invention of email, letters have pretty much become non-existent, but wouldn't it be nice to get something other than bills in the mail.
Skype, Google Plus, Yahoo Messenger etc. There are video conferencing opportunities everywhere now. So not only can you talk to your friend but you can see her new hair cut or her little one playing with blocks in the background. How awesome is that?!
Social Media like Facebook. Social media is great for quick little updates, but does not provide the intimate details (usually) that you would get from a letter or formal conversation.
I have decided to try all of these. Most of them seem pretty simple. I think I will look for a pen-pal first. That one seems the most interesting and uncommon. Here's to great friendships in 2013!!!
I remember when I was a child, I forged friendships while playing outside in the neighborhood or at the park. I attended birthday parties that consisted of cake and a home made game of pin-the-tail on the donkey. If we were lucky we had pizza. I have tried to have these types of parties for my children and no one attends, but throw a party at a roller rink, amusement park, or sales business and you will max out in participation. I also fork over money to organizations, sports associations, and dance studios so my children can get some exercise and social skills since all of the other children are at these things instead of playing in the street.
I decided to see how much it cost me when I did these social activities and this is what I came up with:
That is a lot of money. $107 a month and this does not include the activities my children participated in. This has led me to my current search for free or inexpensive ways to have friendships or social interaction. It is an important part of life and I have decided to not let the economic stagnation and/or decline affect it.
I reviewed some blogs that made suggestions on how to maintain friendships in general. Gretchen Rubin started what she calls a "Happiness Project" that as a part of it she suggests ways to maintain friendships. I found these 8 items to be rather useful. Dummies.com also had some useful information. I strongly identified with the debt princess's article about losing friendships when times got tough for her. In contrast I wanted my article to focus on actual activities one could do to maintain or grow friendships without spending a lot of money or how about any money at all. :D
Game Night. You can do this with families or not. It could be a pot luck or just have a few snacks available.
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| Image courtesy of examiner.com |
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| Cougar Town - Image courtesy of TBS.com |
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| Image courtesy of fisherspeakcommunitychurch.org |
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| Image courtesy of internetmonk.com |
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| Image courtesy of gotoflorida.net |
Phone Calls. Calling a friend once a week, once a month, once a year or whenever can lift the spirits.
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| Image courtesy of istockphoto.com |
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| Image courtesy of essay.tv |
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| Image courtesy of geeksugar.com |
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| Image courtesy of wizmarketings.com |
Monday, January 7, 2013
I feel Like the Court Fool
Maybe some of you will understand what I mean by the title, but in case you do not, the court fool was the entertainment for European royalty back in the day. They often juggled and did many other tricks and jokes.
My juggling act begins today. I recently started work/study which is basically working part time for minimum wage. I am also beginning 15 credit hours of school today. This is all on top of my duties as a mom and wife. Mondays and Wednesday are going to be the hardest. These two days will mark the first time in 4 years that I will not see any of my family from early morning until late at night.
I am very nervous about these two days because I AM the home maker and chef in the family. Who is going to ensure that my family has a delicious and nutritious meal. Last night I prepared as much as I could for my husband, so he could easily toss dinner together, but will I be able to keep this up? I know I am going to be tired and stressed. I will probably be a little mad too and feel sorry for myself.
I just keep reminding myself that this is my last semester and I can finally get out in the work force. I also try to be understanding in that I am not the only person being affected by my juggling act. My children and husband will also be affected. My husband will essentially become a single parent once again; juggling the girls' activities and drama. My daughters will be losing their best friend (at least I am that for now :D) and best cheerleader. Everyone will have to adjust.
Speaking of adjust. I find it interesting that things are so difficult at the beginning of change and by the time you are a pro at it something else changes. What is that all about?
My juggling act begins today. I recently started work/study which is basically working part time for minimum wage. I am also beginning 15 credit hours of school today. This is all on top of my duties as a mom and wife. Mondays and Wednesday are going to be the hardest. These two days will mark the first time in 4 years that I will not see any of my family from early morning until late at night.
I am very nervous about these two days because I AM the home maker and chef in the family. Who is going to ensure that my family has a delicious and nutritious meal. Last night I prepared as much as I could for my husband, so he could easily toss dinner together, but will I be able to keep this up? I know I am going to be tired and stressed. I will probably be a little mad too and feel sorry for myself.
I just keep reminding myself that this is my last semester and I can finally get out in the work force. I also try to be understanding in that I am not the only person being affected by my juggling act. My children and husband will also be affected. My husband will essentially become a single parent once again; juggling the girls' activities and drama. My daughters will be losing their best friend (at least I am that for now :D) and best cheerleader. Everyone will have to adjust.
Speaking of adjust. I find it interesting that things are so difficult at the beginning of change and by the time you are a pro at it something else changes. What is that all about?
Monday, December 24, 2012
Merry Christmas Eve!
I am so excited that it is Christmas Eve! This is the first time since 2008 that I have not been in my own house for Christmas. This year we traveled to my in laws in Texas for Christmas Vacation. I always get a little nervous when blending Christmas traditions from other families, but my in laws have been great. They are so laid back and I am sure they enjoy my cooky goofy ways.
Today I am baking cookies with my daughters. I already made gluten free sugar cookies with Kailah and Charlie. I found a recipe on my all recipe app for a simple sugar cookie. I substituted Bob's Red Mill All Purpose Gluten Free Baking Mix for the flour and substituted half the butter with mashed banana. Everyone seems to like them.
As I am typing this, I am waiting to make Chocolate Chip cookies with Kairah and Kaijah. Kaijah's science teacher used the recipe to teach her students how to use measurements. So we got the mix in a cute jar and just have to add the wet ingredients. (picture to follow soon).
I am so enjoying Christmas music on my iPhone via iheartradio. I really love technology sometimes :D Charlie has had so much fun today singing and dancing to the music. She even sings some of the songs, although some of the lyrics might be a little different.We have also been tracking Santa on NORAD through the computer and my iPhone.
It has been a great Christmas Eve so far.
Today I am baking cookies with my daughters. I already made gluten free sugar cookies with Kailah and Charlie. I found a recipe on my all recipe app for a simple sugar cookie. I substituted Bob's Red Mill All Purpose Gluten Free Baking Mix for the flour and substituted half the butter with mashed banana. Everyone seems to like them.
As I am typing this, I am waiting to make Chocolate Chip cookies with Kairah and Kaijah. Kaijah's science teacher used the recipe to teach her students how to use measurements. So we got the mix in a cute jar and just have to add the wet ingredients. (picture to follow soon).
I am so enjoying Christmas music on my iPhone via iheartradio. I really love technology sometimes :D Charlie has had so much fun today singing and dancing to the music. She even sings some of the songs, although some of the lyrics might be a little different.We have also been tracking Santa on NORAD through the computer and my iPhone.
It has been a great Christmas Eve so far.
Friday, December 7, 2012
Tell Him What you Want
Disclaimer: this post maybe be perceived as being a Scrooge, Grinch or just out right negative, but is in no way meant to be that way.
As most of you know, I have been married 4 times (3 husbands). During all of those failed relationships I would read and read and read, looking for advice to fix my relationships. It took me a while to realize, I just picked the wrong people at first. My first couple of Christmas experiences with my first husband was negative (although our Christmas together before getting married was nice, what happened?!). I pretty much shopped for myself or didn't receive anything. He was never really into the Christmas spirit.
I know Christmas is not about receiving, but it sure does feel nice when others think about you. I love being the giver, but it hurts so much when you do not receive anything. The only thing that ever saved my Christmas was my children and their wonderful made gifts. Often times they would be really sad because mommy didn't get presents from "daddy" or Santa. So, that is mainly why I would "treat" myself to a few things.
With all that being said, the best advice in my opinion that I ever received was "tell them what you want." It was said to me by many people and read in many books and articles. So with my new husband I decided to give this a try. Oh boy oh boy does this not work with my wonderful, loving, and giving husband. He does not like for me to tell him what I want. He seems to have either a stubborn streak or he wants to prove that he knows me better than I know myself.
This year I tried to ensure that I would love what he got me because in the past I either had to pretend or tell him and hurt his feelings. (There is nothing like explaining to your spouse why you don't wear something they bought you.) Now, to be clear he has only missed the mark maybe 3 times, but this year we are tight on money I really do not want something I do not absolutely love. (There was my selfish Grinchy statement. Yes I said it. If I am going to get a gift or gifts this year. I want to love it. I do not want to donate it to a Thrift Shop in 6 months)
Any how, I made a new rule: we will only buy what is one our wish lists (because even I have to admit I hardly ever follow my kids lists, so this was a challenge for me too). I received a super long list from Kairah and Kaijah, a super short list from Kailah and Charlie took pictures with things when we were in stores. Then I asked Lew to make a list, he didn't. I then made my list and put it with the others and texted it to him. It was so organized. It was broken down by price increments and had items under $20 all the way up to over $100 (knew we could not afford that, but hey I can wish right?). I even told him about things; like that cool vacuum robot or costume jewelry. I even sent him pictures when I saw random things in stores.
This leads me to last night and my sheer frustration and deep down desire that my husband really does knows me. We decided to do some present wrapping while we waited for one of our shows. He put my presents in boxes so I could not see what they were. When he came out with three boxes I was super surprised because I did not expect to have so many gifts. I then asked him (with excitement) "oh wow; did you find some things on my list?" I even clapped my hands like a little kid. (I seriously love opening presents) He responded with "no, I did not use your list." I am pretty sure I gave him a crappy look, not intending too. He proceeded with," I think you are going to like what I got you." I attempted to have to conversation about the rules (because I like rules!), but gave up and just enjoyed wrapping presents with him.
I will continue to tell my husband what I want; from presents, to how to make the bed, to whatever. He will probably continue to ignore those requests. I guess maybe this is just how our awesome marriage works. Understand that I did not say perfect. I said awesome! It is awesome because we both decided about 2 years into our marriage that this really is forever. That was the first time I ever truly made that commitment and I could only make that commitment to him because he truly made the commitment to me. That was a first for me. I remember when he told me "stop pushing me away. I am not going anywhere. I love you and we will make this work." Did I ever tell you, my lovely readers, how much I love that man! - With all my heart, frustrations and all!!!!
As most of you know, I have been married 4 times (3 husbands). During all of those failed relationships I would read and read and read, looking for advice to fix my relationships. It took me a while to realize, I just picked the wrong people at first. My first couple of Christmas experiences with my first husband was negative (although our Christmas together before getting married was nice, what happened?!). I pretty much shopped for myself or didn't receive anything. He was never really into the Christmas spirit.
I know Christmas is not about receiving, but it sure does feel nice when others think about you. I love being the giver, but it hurts so much when you do not receive anything. The only thing that ever saved my Christmas was my children and their wonderful made gifts. Often times they would be really sad because mommy didn't get presents from "daddy" or Santa. So, that is mainly why I would "treat" myself to a few things.
With all that being said, the best advice in my opinion that I ever received was "tell them what you want." It was said to me by many people and read in many books and articles. So with my new husband I decided to give this a try. Oh boy oh boy does this not work with my wonderful, loving, and giving husband. He does not like for me to tell him what I want. He seems to have either a stubborn streak or he wants to prove that he knows me better than I know myself.
This year I tried to ensure that I would love what he got me because in the past I either had to pretend or tell him and hurt his feelings. (There is nothing like explaining to your spouse why you don't wear something they bought you.) Now, to be clear he has only missed the mark maybe 3 times, but this year we are tight on money I really do not want something I do not absolutely love. (There was my selfish Grinchy statement. Yes I said it. If I am going to get a gift or gifts this year. I want to love it. I do not want to donate it to a Thrift Shop in 6 months)
Any how, I made a new rule: we will only buy what is one our wish lists (because even I have to admit I hardly ever follow my kids lists, so this was a challenge for me too). I received a super long list from Kairah and Kaijah, a super short list from Kailah and Charlie took pictures with things when we were in stores. Then I asked Lew to make a list, he didn't. I then made my list and put it with the others and texted it to him. It was so organized. It was broken down by price increments and had items under $20 all the way up to over $100 (knew we could not afford that, but hey I can wish right?). I even told him about things; like that cool vacuum robot or costume jewelry. I even sent him pictures when I saw random things in stores.
This leads me to last night and my sheer frustration and deep down desire that my husband really does knows me. We decided to do some present wrapping while we waited for one of our shows. He put my presents in boxes so I could not see what they were. When he came out with three boxes I was super surprised because I did not expect to have so many gifts. I then asked him (with excitement) "oh wow; did you find some things on my list?" I even clapped my hands like a little kid. (I seriously love opening presents) He responded with "no, I did not use your list." I am pretty sure I gave him a crappy look, not intending too. He proceeded with," I think you are going to like what I got you." I attempted to have to conversation about the rules (because I like rules!), but gave up and just enjoyed wrapping presents with him.
I will continue to tell my husband what I want; from presents, to how to make the bed, to whatever. He will probably continue to ignore those requests. I guess maybe this is just how our awesome marriage works. Understand that I did not say perfect. I said awesome! It is awesome because we both decided about 2 years into our marriage that this really is forever. That was the first time I ever truly made that commitment and I could only make that commitment to him because he truly made the commitment to me. That was a first for me. I remember when he told me "stop pushing me away. I am not going anywhere. I love you and we will make this work." Did I ever tell you, my lovely readers, how much I love that man! - With all my heart, frustrations and all!!!!
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