I'm a rebel! At least that is why my husband tells me.
To him the word rebel has new meaning. It describes a person that follows the rules instead of breaks them. A person that tries to bring back the way things should be instead of fighting against it.
This day in age we just do things whatever way. We try to get what we can from whom ever we can to suit our own needs. We do what we are told by someone else who was told by someone else who was told by someone else. Somewhere in that chain was a lazy no good person, I promise. I found this out the hard way and it changed me forever.
When I was just a wee little airman in the big ol' Air Force I did what I was told and trained. Unfortunately, something about my personality did not allow me to get away with playing dumb and blaming my screw ups on just doing what I was told. I was always in trouble and finally I got an Article 15 punishment for doing things that "everyone" else was doing and that I thought was right. I'm not going to go into the details, but it was the lamest Article 15 in history (in my opinion) and I even received apologizes behind closed doors from those who realized how stupid it was. Either way, it scarred me and changed my for life forever.
Since that time I have been a researcher, rule follower, and distrusting of anyone else's processes. This has kept me out of trouble for sure, but it makes me look like a b!@#$ and know-it-all. It is not my intent, but following others had ruined my life at times, so if having enemies it what it takes, oh well.
This brings me to my latest know-it-all adventures and unfortunately it has to do with my husband's place of work, so I had to be extra careful in how I handled this situation.
When I found out about our assignment to Germany I freaked because of our Medical Clearances. So, I started asking folks about the likely-hood of us being denied. I was told by one person to just inquire ahead of time to see what the norm is, so that is what I planned on doing until....I ran across a Facebook post about Family Medical Clearances. Their situation was nothing like mine, but they got screwed over big time. So I posted a little "hook" to see what would happen. I typed "oh wow, I hope that this does not happen to us. My hubby just got a follow-on to Germany." Then it happened. A rule follower just like me posted "you have to do a clearance before he leaves for Korea and then again within 6 months." I thought "What?!" no one told me this. I replied, "I was never told this. I will look into it." She chimed in quickly "really, you have to do this." After reading how adamant she was, I realized that this was a process hardly anyone followed, but it is important.
Woo hoo! ^^^that right there^^^ sparked the researcher in me. I started looking into it. I read the guidance and had my husband go ask about it. The office denied that it needed to be done. I decided to proceed with the paperwork, but try to have my husband do all the talking so I did not aggravate anyone. I am just a spouse now and a spouse telling someone how to do their job never goes over well. So for the last few months I have been working my end. The whole time I felt that something was wrong. It didn't help that a friend of mine was getting the run around from the Tricare (insurance office) and medical clearance folks. We started working together to figure this mess out.
Yesterday I decided to brave the Medical Group building. I avoid that place because I do not want to rock the boat for my husband as I have unfortunately done in the past. It had to be done. I had to chose my family over his sanity this time. I had the perfect excuse: more paperwork to be dropped off. I played it cool and dropped hints about the double process a few times until the person inquired as to when we were leaving. She thought we had a typo on the paperwork and was chainging all the dates. After more "are you sures" and "I was told this and I was told that" I finally got brave and said "I looked it up in the AFI only because its in my nature to be that way from my prior service." I was nice when I said it and I felt pretty okay with it because she seemed to already like my husband. She replied that she was new to the process and never saw that, but asked me if I could show her. She sounded like she did not believe me, but handed me the guidance.
I was super nervous. I had not wrote the page or anything down. She left me to look. I was so happy when I found it! I did not want to look like an a$% if I could not find it. She was surprised, but seemed relieved. The entire time I was in the office I was so nervous that I was going to cause problems for my husband, but I was also sick to my stomach that not following the rules would bite us in the a$%. I thanked her for treating me with respect because I often do not get listened to as a spouse anymore. She was super sweet and I left feeling better.
I am still worried that word will get out about what I did and cause issues for my husband, not because she is going to complain, but because of the terrible gossip train. I talked to him about it that night and he told me he will deal with whatever comes. As long as I was respectful, I did nothing wrong and he supports me.
Let me tell you: I love that man. He loves and accepts the "rebel" in me even though he is the opposite of me. We definitely balance each other out.
I'm sure there are others out there that will think what I did was crazy, stupid, wrong. I just hope they do not make mean comments on this post :D I may seem like a bad a$% but I am really just a softy.
I am curious as to how many others out there feel the way I do. Do you follow the rules and question others?
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