Military Spouses Should Be Seen and Not Heard

Here are a few gems of the comments:

 we need to print this out and frame it. Then we will hang it in CS!!! 

CS means Customer Service. So, this military member thinks it would be great to post this and offend every spouse that walks into the main office. WTF?

I always told them the military member needs to call.

Why? If we are a family and this affects us, why can't I know or at least inquire about the process, so I can help my spouse. Maybe he is super busy and I am doing nothing since I am unemployed due to being a spouse that moves every 2-4 years. Give me something to occupy my time with and free up his time to work. 

Now, there were some smart comments too:

 No I try to treat everyone the way I would want to be treated but when you start to throw rank and be rude that's when my customer service starts to go away!  You should know we get the crazy/rude ones every now and then!
This comment makes sense to me. If I am rude to you, yes by all means put me in my place. But, if I am nicely questioning a process because I am taking care of my husband and family's best interest, then put your ego aside and help me. 

So, I have been looking at this Facebook post everyday since the 2nd of August. It has bothered me since then, but even more so since yesterday. Why? It is because I realized that I do not stand up for what is right anymore because I am a spouse and this is how people view us.

I am currently managing my spouse's assignment processing from afar. He likes it that way (other than my pinging). I am seeing that there are some potential oversights that can negatively affect him. I know this! I researched it. It is a part of who I was in the Air Force; defending my customers and doing right by them. I am a super sleuth. I can find the answer to just about anything and understand AFIs (Air Force Instructions) better than most. So, even though I know there are things going wrong, I sit at home and do nothing but find more and more information about it being mismanaged. I know from past experience that if I try to bring this information to whom ever is making the mistake, honest or not, their only defense will be "she is a spouse trying to wear her husbands rank." Guess what! It will work. I have happened upon some people who value my input, but it is rare. I cannot say it is all people that think this way, but it seems to be atmosphere on base.

Here is my problem with this way of thinking. My husband has his talents and weaknesses and I have mine. We are the perfect pair because we complement each other. This "talent" of mine is one thing I bring to the table and I am expected to try to explain things to my husband so he can explain it to someone else. It is like playing telephone. If they ask him a question that he needs me to clarify, then he has to go back to me. It gives him less credibility and makes for a frustrating process. It also gives way for information to get lost in "translation."  So, if he was smart enough to marry a woman like me, then why is it he can not use my talents efficiently? Why can't I sit next to him in is supervisor's office and let him say "my wife can explain this better." 

You go to retirement ceremonies and they give the spouse a certificate for her service. We are talked about in high regard during many ceremonies; the fact that we are a huge factor in our military spouse's successes. The military member always talks about how they could not do what they do with out us, so why do we have to be hidden from sight unless we are helping at a bake sale or attending a holiday party? 

True we should not throw around our spouse's rank to get things we want like little brats, but I think we should be able to be helpful and in the know of what is going on with OUR lives too.